So, I’m getting married the day after tomorrow. As a result, I will be away from a computer until September 7th or so. Which means that you’ll have to look elsewhere for your complaining needs. But, rest assured that I will be thinking about each and every one of you, Loyal Readers, the whole time I’m on my honeymoon. Seriously.
And I’ll be back. But not until next month. Try not to miss me too much.
Suspect Held in Ramsey Slaying
First, I can’t believe it’s been ten years since JonBenet was killed. Second, I had no idea anyone still cared. But apparently they arrested some guy in Thailand, who claims the whole thing was an accident. I’m sure everyone will believe that. When you get arrested on sex charges, and happen to admit that you were involved with the “accidental” death of a six-year-old beauty queen, most people are going to throw the whole “innocent until proven guilty” thing out the window. I wonder if this will be all over the news again. They LOVE showing the pictures of her with eight pounds of makeup on.
Appetite for destruction – August 21, 2006
The grain required to fill a 25-gallon SUV gas tank with ethanol, for instance, could feed one person for a year. If today’s entire U.S. grain harvest were converted into fuel for cars, it would still satisfy less than one-sixth of U.S. demand.
While it’s nice to see GM trying to save the world, they are heading in the WRONG DIRECTION with corn-based ethanol. It is not sustainable. It may mean that we’re less dependant on the Middle East, but it means were more dependant on somewhere else. Not a solution to the problem, just pusing the problem off into the future.
CNN.com – Boy, 12, evades security clampdown – Aug 16, 2006
LONDON, England — Despite a high level of alert at British airports, a 12-year-old boy managed to board a plane at Gatwick without a passport, ticket or boarding pass.
The important question, though is, “Was he carrying any liquids or an iPod?” Seriously, why do we have security at the airport if it’s not meaningful? Are they really just trying to collect nail clippers and screwdrivers to sell on eBay?
Edit: Again, I say something, and BoingBoing backs it up. The letter they link to, from a chemisty grad student, is pretty funny. And makes our security measures look pretty ridiculous.
Even worse, many agencies which have received large budgetary increases are not even remotely related to the war on terror.
Because, of course, if you aren’t fighting the war on terror, obviously you don’t need any money. Education and health care don’t matter if the terrorists hate our way of life so much they want to kill us.
I’ve often wondered about today’s Republicans. Previously, being Republican meant small central government, lower taxes, let the local governments take care of as much as possible. I think that, in general, is a good idea. The government should step into our lives only when necessary, and then it should do it as gently as possible. The government exists to help the people live their lives, not as an entity for itself.
But no one seems to want small, localized government these days. And when the National Review starts bashing Republicans for not being very Republican, you know we’re in trouble.
CNN.com – U.S. plans for Mideast foiled, Syrian president says – Aug 15, 2006
Hezbollah leader Sheik Hassan Nasrallah has declared “strategic, historic victory” against Israel.
So, Hezbollah says they’ve won, too. That’s pretty cool. Everyone wins!
The Truth About Cars Chevrolet Uplander This review is funny in part because I’m ashamed of American car companies and their continued quest to not provide anything useful to the world beyond jobs for factory workers, so I like hearing GM-bashing. But it’s also funny for phrases like “execrable automotive aardvark” and “the Uplander’s plastics seem designed by rental car companies for rental car companies; their ability to withstand endless applications of industrial strength ammonia being their only saving grace.”. I think most phrases with the word “execrable” are funny. That’s because it sounds like “excrement”! Or looks like it. Or something. Great. This is the 100th post on Complaint Hub, and I’m making poop jokes.
Hezbollah the Loser In Battle, Bush Says
“Forces of terror see the changes that are taking place in their midst. They understand that the advance of liberty, the freedom to worship, the freedom to dissent, and the protection of human rights would be a defeat for their hateful ideology,” Bush said. “But they also know that young democracies are fragile and that this may be their last and best opportunity to stop freedom’s advance and steer newly free nations to the path of radical extremism.”
Every time I hear statements like this from Bush, I hear his imitator on Saturday Night Live talking about “strategery”. Was that Will Ferrell, or someone else? I can hear it in my head, but I can’t quite picture him. Anyway, an equally effective image that this should conjure up is Cookie Monster. “Terror bad. Liberty and freedom good! Me love cookies!”.
I don’t like making fun of the way Bush speaks, as I’ve said before, because I think it tends to be the thing that people notice and latch onto, and then they miss the fact that he’s doing terrible things to the country. But I just can’t help myself here. He just enjoys saying “terror” and “hateful” and “freedom” too much.
Oh, well. What I should be focusing on here is how he has, again, delcared victory in a fight that’s long from over. He seems to think that he gets to determine when a conflict is over, and who won. I know that whole “Mission Accomplished” banner wasn’t his fault, but the administration has talked about how we “won” the war in Iraq for years, but last time I checked, people were still dying over there. That’s not winning in my book. And neither has Israel won. There may be a temporary cease-fire, which is good, it will hopefully allow some diplomacy to happen. But if people start thinking that this is over, they haven’t been paying attention to the entire history of the region.
Boing Boing: Chertoff: We must “eliminate people who are susceptible to becoming killers”
Apparently BoingBoing was listening, as they’ve now provided an even stupider quote from Chertoff. Awesome.
Newsvine – Chertoff: U.S. Should Review Terror Laws – via BoingBoing
“What helped the British in this case is the ability to be nimble, to be fast, to be flexible, to operate based on fast-moving information,” [Chertoff] said. “We have to make sure our legal system allows us to do that. It’s not like the 20th century, where you had time to get warrants.”
And there you go. A wonderful quote from the guy in charge of making us safe. Who do you suppose is going to protect us from Homeland Security?