Is Brandon Fahey the worst hitter ever?

Just watching a bit of the Orioles-Nationals game. It seems so far that we have Evil Daniel Cabrera rather than Unhittable Daniel Cabrera. He didn’t walk a batter in the two run first inning, but just about every ball he threw was hit hard, and only some good anticipation by Brian Roberts to get a double play got them out of the inning only down 2-0. But Brandon Fahey. Do you understand what it means to have a career OPS+ of 50? This guy must have photos of the O’s GM doing something really, really awful. I know it was time to get rid of Miguel Tejada, but I think I speak for most Orioles fans when I say that we expected you to replace him with a real major league player. Now the bases are loaded for the Nats with two outs in the bottom of the first. I need to go find a bottle of tequila.

So we meet again

ShysterBall | Cito Gaston’s Second Coming

Gibbons is out in Toronto. Cito is back!

I hate Cito Gaston. Ever since the 1993 All Star Game, when he picked half the Blue Jays team and didn’t put hometown hero (Well, before he jumped ship to the Yankees) Mike Mussina into the game, I’ve hoped that bad things would happen to him. Not bad like losing a limb or a child or anything like that, but bad like losing an inordinate amount of socks in the dryer, or living next door to a really bad teenage garage band. And now he’s back as the manager of the Blue Jays. He was reasonably successful ten to fifteen years ago, but that’s a long time ago. Anyway, I wish him the worst possible luck in his continued management career. But, you know, nothing really bad.

Wow.

I thought the Celtics were going to win Game 6. I didn’t think the Lakers had any chance of sweeping two in Boston. But I have to admit that I did not anticipate watching the Celtics absolutely blow the Lakers off the floor. That was incredible. The second half was like watching a #1 seed crush the winner of the play-in game. I hope this settles the argument once and for all – Kobe Bryant is not Michael Jordan. Aside from the first four minutes of this game, when he was spectacular, he might as well have been on the bench. My two major complaints: 1) ABC didn’t manage to get the HD feed working until the second quarter. Nice job, ABC. 2) The NBA took their really great “Where [whatever] happens” ad campaign and turned it into a really cheesy championship merchandise ad. Way to blow it at the last minute, NBA. Other than that, what a friggin’ night.

Bring on Game 4

The Lakers won Game 3 at home last night, to the surprise of pretty much no one. However, if you’re a Lakers fan, you can’t possibly be happy with that game. Paul Pierce was in foul trouble the whole game, and wasn’t hitting his shots when he was in the game. Garnett didn’t shoot well. And it still took 20 points from Sasha Vujacic to beat Boston. I’m going to go ahead and go out on a limb and say that he doesn’t repeat that performance in this series. In any event, I feel good about the series. Pierce (2 for 14) and Garnett (6 for 21) will play better tomorrow. Kobe got to the line plenty of times and still didn’t dominate the game like the announcers keep saying he will. By the way, I am pretty tired of hearing about him the entire game. He is being contained. 36 points is nice, but nothing special for him, and he had one assist. If Odom and Gasol don’t step it up, this is going to be a tough run for the Lakers when Vujacic, Pierce, and Garnett go back to normal.

Back from Boston

imgp1119 So we’re back from Boston. The trip home sucked – I was tired and hungover after being out until 3, and our train was late, dumping us at Union Station just after midnight. Other than that, the trip was fantastic. The Game, if you didn’t watch it or read about it, was a good one for a Boston fan, so long as you ignore that little 31-9 run by the Lakers in the fourth. The company was fantastic as usual. I finally made it to Beer Works. And the experience of watching a Finals game at the Garden was incredible. The video I posted to Flickr doesn’t do it justice – my crappy little point-and-shoot didn’t pick up most of the crowd noise. But I think you get the idea. We left the game hoarse from yelling, and the wife has a little bruise on her wrist where her bracelet kept hitting when she clapped. There were some L.A. fans at the game, but not too many. It was funny listening to Celtics fans give them a hard time. It was mostly pretty good-natured. One kid walking behind us as we headed towards our seats was yelling at any Lakers fans he saw, until two big guys passed by. He shut up pretty quickly then. I turned around and laughed at him, and he sort of shrugged. I guess he hadn’t yet drank away his survival instinct. And now it’s almost time for Game 3.

More and more annoyed

The more I think about it, the more I’m annoyed that I missed the Nationals game today. How often do you see a guy like Albert Pujols walk on to the field as a pinch hitter and hit his 297th career home run? This guy is twenty-eight. His career batting average is .333, OBP .423, SLG .621. If you aren’t a baseball fan, you may not understand those numbers. That’s okay. They’re absurd. If he plays at more or less this level for the next five to ten years, which is what’s going to happen unless he gets hurt, he is a first ballot Hall of Famer, the kind of guy you don’t even debate. It’s just a given. So I’m pretty disappointed that I didn’t get to see him. And the Cardinals aren’t coming back to DC this season. I’ll see him one of these days, though. Next year I get an earlier shot at the company season tickets, so I should be able to pick up a Cardinals game. Now back to the basketball game.

Rainout

Running for coverThe Nationals game was rained out last night, so I didn’t get to see Albert Pujols. It was fun anyway – we wandered around the stadium, stopped at Ben’s Chili Bowl, and then came home. I actually saw someone wearing a McGwire shirt. I’m kind of surprised – I thought he was pretty much disgraced and forgotten. I mean, he was my favorite player growing up, and I wouldn’t wear a McGwire shirt. There was also a tiny girl in an Eckstein jersey, probably about the size of Eckstein himself. I’d guess she weighed about 95 pounds. I almost took a picture of her to send to Fire Joe Morgan, but then I thought she might not appreciate it. Edit to add: They’re making up the game today at 1, which doesn’t really work for my schedule, but Pujols isn’t playing. I don’t really mind missing a game between the awful Nationals and the Pujols-free Cardinals. Edit again to add: Pujols pinch hit in the 7th and hit one out in a 4-1 Cardinals win. Now I’m annoyed. I should have gone to the game.

My wife is the good kind of crazy

So it looks like I’m going to Boston this weekend. The wife has orchestrated a huge family-and-friends get-together at Game 2 of the NBA Finals on Sunday. All the details aren’t yet in, but it looks like my father-in-law and at least two brothers-in-law will be there, plus some other friends. We’re taking the train up on Sunday, in part because we have a wedding in Annapolis on Saturday. Then back home on the train on Monday to go back to work Tuesday, since we’re missing the following Monday for our Vegas trip. I thought Paris was our babymoon, but I guess I was wrong. Games at the Garden when the wife was living in Connecticut have achieved legendary status, so I’m looking forward to this. I’ve never been to a pro sports playoff game. I guess Celtics-Lakers is a good way to start. Of course, we’re busy at work right now. So I’m going to be working on the train, which should be interesting. But at least I have that option.

Bill Simmons is fired

I read Bill Simmons for a long time. He’s written some funny articles, and his nomination of Bo Jackson as the greatest video game athlete of all time is absolutely right. And he was cool, years ago, when the Celtics, Red Sox, and Patriots all sucked. He’d talk about his beloved local teams now and then, but it wasn’t anything I couldn’t ignore. But when they started doing well, it became quite clear that he would be better off writing for the Boston Globe and not something national. Well, maybe he wouldn’t be better off, but we would. He couldn’t go a paragraph without mentioning his teams. And I actually used to like the Pats and the Sox – my grandmother spends a lot of time in New England, so she got to root for both teams a bit, and since they were both terrible for a long time, I was happy to root for them when they weren’t playing the Orioles or Redskins. And then they got good. You, Red Sox fans, are some of the most annoying in all of sports. Some of you, the real die hards, are okay. But most of you have been waiting years, not for your team to be as good as the Yankees, but for you to have the excuse to be as annoying as Yankees fans. It only took one World Series victory to turn you from lovable underdogs into Yankees fans who wear red. But back to Simmons. He had an internship contest that my brother entered. He went to great lengths to explain how he was going to choose the winner, and then ignored all his rules and chose someone who simply aped his style. I stopped reading him completely a few years ago. I just got tired of him talking about his favorite teams all the time. I’d stop reading an article as soon as he started to gush about a Boston team, and pretty soon there wasn’t much for me to read. Many of you may have read this article, which I did not, but apparently it’s not flattering to the Celtics. The wife directs me to this response from Celtics Blog.

From here on out: Stop It. Just Stop. We no longer want you talking about our team publicly. You’ve lost all credibility with Celtics fans. All of it. Don’t bother with some lame and dumb reverse jinx excuse to explain your writing. And really, spare us the joyous article after we do win the title. None of us want to hear about it from Showtime Simmons. Enjoy rooting for Kobe, we hope you’ll be happier sitting next to Diane Cannon, just don’t tell us about it.

I hope he takes it to heart. He has to decide if he’s really a fan, in which case he should write for a Boston area publication and love his teams no matter what, or he can be a national columnist and pretend he cares about other teams in the league (Aside from, apparently, the Lakers). And speaking of the Celtics (The one team from Boston I still like, because the wife loves them and I never had a basketball team I cared about), I actually agree with Mike Wilbon for the first time in a while – the offensive foul on Paul Pierce that they called on his late three point attempt was absolutely awful. I’m glad it didn’t end up affecting the outcome, because it was just terrible. Tayshaun Prince jumped in the air and landed on Pierce while he was shooting and somehow it’s an offensive foul? Crazy. Anyway, I’m looking forward to game 1 on Thursday. Unlike Simmons, I actually want the Celtics to win, and think they can do it. It’ll be tough – LA is a great team. But it can be done, and it can be done by the Celtics. Edit to add: An LA fan thinks that Simmons sucks, too.